A mum’s point of view
Hey everyone, its Em ! For my first blog I have decided to interview a mum who is part of the community. Meet Millie Lendvay, mother to Brittany (25) and Bailey Karpin (23). I got to chat with Millie and discuss her perspective on raising two kids with autism and the support she gets from her family and friends.
With Brittany and Bailey being non-verbal, is it quiet at home?
“It can be, but I try to play music, have the TV on in the background and i do a lot of talking to them. They have reasonable understanding and can let me know what they want. There is always activity as they never sit still. So it may be quiet by sound but not by activity”
Do you feel isolated?
“It is very hard not getting a lot of feedback or general conversation. It’s always a one way conversation which is hard to keep up. I am the one that has to initiate what we do, eat and where we go. They don’t like tv or computers and can get bored at home, so we need to keep busy. Going out is hard on my own with them both, they like different things and go in different directions. However, it’s not just me that is isolated they are as well. They don’t have friends so it is up to me to make sure they stay connected to other people.”
What support do you get from the community?
“They have their day programs during the weekdays which keeps them busy and happy. They are also part of a young adults social group that meets for a couple of hours on the weekend. This is a fantastic opportunity to mix with their peers and experience young age appropriate outings that I can’t take them to.”
Are your friends supportive and inclusive?
“My friends are kind and supportive and include Brittany and Bailey where they can, but mostly their children are grown up and are independent, so they do adult outings. It feels weird to bring my children along, and if I do, their needs are consuming so it isn’t easy.”
What do you consider to be your kid’s greatest achievements?
“I have tried to give my children an exciting and normal life and expose them to as many opportunities as I can. We go out shopping, to cafes, restaurants, gym, bike riding and ski resorts as they can both ski. They have travelled and even though people stare at them and sometimes don’t understand, it hasn’t stopped us from getting on with living our lives.”
How could our community improve your kids life?
“It’s always nice when people smile and talk to them, offering to help if they can is always appreciated. Brittany and Bailey don’t look like they have a disability at first glance so people in a hurry often find they get in their way. Slow down, be tolerant and be appreciative of what they have and can do. A little kindness goes a long way.”
I’d like to thank Millie for her time in taking part in this interview. It has been insightful to understand more about herself and the life she lives with her two autistic children